Confessions

My boyfriend started smoking cigars. :[

So this rotten piece of shit bit the dust today. A heroin addict, emo, loser was thrown from a car in a sever accident and killed. He was also a hack rapper and glorified habitual use of heroin and underage sex with minors. People rally around this scum like he is so great. I am happy to know that this guy is dead. Karma gave him what he was long overdue on.

i sang once in front of my whole school for a talent show and its really embarssing looking back on it because im actually a really bad singer and i didn’t realize it at the time. oops.

My dad is on psycho pills and my mom should be I know she was hurt by him she was a strong woman when I was younger. People hurt people with psychological abuse more than physical abuse. Some people get broken like my mom and some people rebound and get stronger. I wish she would get some help I want my mom back.

I like that you’re paranoid too. I like how you’re claustrophobic. I like your flaws, they make you more like me because I am one fucked up girl. He always got so mad when I got paranoid or anything but you understand.

I am really not impressed with you ignoring me.

There are some things I can never tell even the closest of friends.
I will not confess my mistakes, lost hope, depression or sexuality.
What I will say is I am me.
And that will never be enough.

By nature i have a very vengeful heart. When people hurt me i think of many cruel ways i can get them back. When people make me mad physical reaction my body goes through feels discusting and makes it feel as if im about to erupt. Yet i dont strike out physically. I do everything i can to not get someone back. If i ever lash out in defense verbally its because i cant control it. I wish certain people understood that its an effort i make to be nice when i really want to yell. I wish men could understand this when they pull their power play shit on me. Cuz in my head im rippin out hair and stomping on their face. 🙂

I hope you’re well. I only want good things for you. I hope you know that’s true.

i am sick of being disappointed and lied to by you.

I have never felt so stupid in my entire life. I opened myself up to you. I trusted you even when you know I’m always guarded. You broke my heart and then basically took a shit on it. I feel so betrayed, and what’s more I look like the biggest idiot in the world. How could you do this to me? It wouldn’t take that much effort to talk to me after that night, when you know I was unsure about what we did. I thought I really liked you but now I won’t ever allow anyone close to my heart again. I will be stuck behind a wall that I myself put up, all because of you. Do you feel powerful now?

Im very compelled to make an opera song an sing it in a fake foreign language i made up on the spot. Then find someone who knows many different languages and see if anything sang are actual words.

Cap: receptor orknom
thats funny.

I just carved three Xs into my pubic area and I hope they scar real good and clear, because they look real fucking cool. I don’t care that my cutting makes my girlfriend angry. Maybe she should be more supportive!

I can’t help but toss off everytime I see Shakira

Suddenly, I’m totally okay with the fact that it all didn’t go according to the plan I put together in my head a month and a half ago. I am so happy and I’m pretty sure you are too. I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Someone thought I was pregnant today. I am not! I didn’t think I was that fat. Now I can’t even get out of bed I am so depressed.

Comic Relief makes me cry like a baby.

If I had my own disposable income and wasn’t just a kid I would give as much as I possibly could.

Im just shakin ma head, rollin thine eyes and blowin spit bubbles with my mouth while chewing gum walking. Last part not true. Lying down.

In a sense, you will always be stuck with me because I will always love you. You’ll always be in my night sky. You’ll always be my heaven, my nirvana…forever. <3

I like that you like me back.