Confessions

I tried to go to a support group for amputees, but no one else showed up…
They cancelled the group…
Am i really the only one that needs support to get through this?
And if not, should i be embarrassed enough not to ask for support?

I skipped my Spanish class yesterday because I didn’t feel like dealing with my teachers bullshit.

i moved across the country to better myself for my girlfriend. we were always under the assumption that when we got to a good place in our lives we’d be able to love eachother properly, so for a year we were on the rocks doing our own thing on 2 ends of the country. She was constantly saying how bad I needed to move back and come live with her, so eventually I did after about a year and a month. When I did get back there, she stayed with some dork she’d been with for what she claims was one month but in reality was the whole year. After a month of her pretending like she had broken up with him and me staying in the same house as her, I decided to move back to where I was. When I moved back she got with him again. She told him how she missed him while I was living in the same house as her. she claims shes in love with me and everything and said i should move back so we could really give it a try. like a fucking idiot i moved back.

She wont kiss me. She wont have sex with me. She says its awkward and I should give her time. she says that when we kiss it doesnt feel right and that i should be patient and stop pressuring her. what the fuck am i doing here? its crazy because i feel like im in the wrong, but this whole fucking situation is wrong. this blows. im gonna get the fuck out of here. this is fucking stupid.

I don’t want to distract you anymore.
And frankly, I can’t be distracted, either.
I’m going to start backing off little by little. I think it’s the right thing to do.
I’m your good friend, definitely; I never want that to change.
And I will love you always.

WOW! I fucked my boyfriend with with a dildo the other night! It was amazing watching that cock go in and out of his asshole! I stroked his cock and made him Cum while I fucked his ass, and it made me so wet! He told me all kids of nasty things while I fucked him. He wants a real cock, he wants to suck a real cock, and he wants to fuck another man in the ass while I watch. I am so turned on by all of this. I would love for a real man to fuck him. I want my boyfriend to sick on a dick and swallow cum. WOW I am so turned on right now!!

You betrayed me twice. First, by breaking up with me… and second, by not wanting to be my friend. I don’t know how I could ever forgive you, let alone, even want to be your friend again. It’s been a few months since that *day*, and I still can’t get over the fact you betrayed me twice, even after not doing anything to you either. I hope you made the right choice.

My boyfriend and I broke up. It was only for a month….during which time I slept with 3 different men, one two days before we got back together… I never told, and I never will.

A week or two after we got back together I found out I was pregnant. Since having sex with him and the other man were so close together, I don’t really know for sure….

Since I never told my boyfriend, the baby’s paternity was never questioned. I forced him to join the army so that the baby would be provided for.
We are married, and living in Germany. We have a good life, and money to spare. I can be a stay at home mom, which is what I wanted since I had the baby.

….but I can’t stop thinking about what it would have been like if I picked a different man to be the father.

My husband is Mexican, and I am white…..

hopefully he never questions why the baby looks so much more like me, than him..

This hurts me a lot more then it hurts her. She says she numb, I wish I could feel numb like her. I think maybe if I was numb I could sleep with out being in pain or get out of bed and be ok for a little while. She says she is never coming back, but I am stubborn and I am going to wait till I can not wait anymore. I wish you would come I miss and I need you more then you know.

I wont be phased by your attempts…sorry dude, nice try though. 😀

recently i’ve had a fetish for black cock.
i also like bestiality.
i realised i like black cock so much because it’s big and reminds me of horse dick.
and it looks so stiff and delicious.

I don’t want to kill myself, but I worry about how easy it would be.

i have so much anger in me. i just want to kill my ex bf for causing so much shit on me! ugh! FUCK YOU!

there are only pictures flashed onto my mind, if only i could draw them up..
but they were nightmares..how could i even draw them in the first place?

what if i convert them into words?
but words are not able to explain the traumas and nightmares that i had…
those are memories..

they are scarier than i thought
and i couldn’t forget about them, i couldn’t lead myself a normal life
whenever i realize there’s such nightmares and traumas

or that people in this world had to go through them..
i can’t be happy

i have no reason to be happy
even though i wish everyone could be happy
but i just can’t be happy
whenever i know there’s someone out there suffer…

and all i can do is keep floating those sadness , written with words…
or keep it here, posting here

and it’s excruciating..

My heart aches, this is not fair. When did you decide Almighty One,that the lesson to learn was to love so deep with everything I have,even though we cannot ever be together again? Six and a half years together and eleven years apart, lesson well learned!Thank you for opening my eyes to your purpose.I love him just as much as if it were the beginning of our time together,Unconditional Love,I get it now.Could you be so kind Almighty One and pass that lesson on to him too!

I hope you weren’t trying to get rid of me. I love you.

Fuck you Nate. I can’t believe I ever did anything with you.

I’ve made it so you can’t reach me.

I just want to fuck you out of my head.

I’m getting a pregnancy test on Friday. If it’s negative, I’m not going to tell you I even thought I might be. I don’t want you to have to bare this burden unnessisarily.

Ill pretend i dont love you if its what you want. But i will love you . Im crying like a dumass.