I have tried (and used regularly in some cases) every major drug- weed, hash (in joints, blunts and of course bonged), valium, speed, acid (tabs and microdots), mushrooms, salvia, coke, crack and smoked heroin a coupla times. Out of the illegal drugs my (former) ecstacy use/abuse worries me the most- I have seriously dropped between 3 and 4 hundred e’s in my life. Nowadays I only get high occasionly (I have even stopped smoking weed as it just slows me down so much now). I still drink very heavily at weekends but can live with that as its legal and not so frowned upon by society.
The above worries me as I feel that I never did it all to get away from anything. I have a stable home life, a job, car, and friends. I wasn’t dropped on my head as a child and have never suffered any significant major emotional trauma. I just wanted to get high and live to enjoy myself. I never wanted to get old without experiencing a bit of craziness.
I don’t regret what I have done but do occasionaly worry what effect this will have in the future for me now I’ve calmed down a little. I sometimes wonder what sort of person I would be without these experiences in terms of my intelligence and where I would be at the moment career wise (I’m certainly not fulfilling my potential at the moment.)
This is the confession of a 21 yr old male whos never had a real girlfriend.