8.5 years ago i met a guy. he was perfect. he liked everything i liked. loved to hang out with me. wanted me to meet everyone he knew, even his family. told everyone i was with him without thinking twice about his reputation. gave me gifts and took me on dates. i was the happiest person on the planet when i was with him. sometimes he would get grim and talk about how he wouldn’t be able to live without me or how he wasn’t sure how he would take it if i wasn’t with him any more but i put that off as normal teenage crap. one day we decided to go to my house to hang out like we had done many times before hand. that was the day my whole world came crashing down. my mom had heard a few things from some of my friends that were too afraid to tell me themselves and had done a background check on him. turns out that guy i loved, cared for, and trusted didn’t exist. not only was he a level 2 sex offender but his own mother lied to me as well. they told me he was 18 and had gotten into some trouble with violence as a kid. turns out that violence was his brothers sisters and cousins all ranging in ages 4 to 12 being paid and bribed into doing horrible things of a sexual nature. i was just another victim. not only had he completely fooled me but through me he got to two of my friends. he was also very active in the rave scene picking up under age girls there. he was and still is a sex offender. now hes a level 3 and thanks to shutting down McNeil island he is being released soon. 4 years ago i was called in to give a statement against him that was supposed to put him away for the rest of his life. being that he managed to pass me a message even when he was in jail about how we would”be together again no matter what” i was all for it. i had to relive every horrible detail of that time again. i was emotionally wrecked afterward but picked myself up again soon. i never had a need for a counselor because it was over and i was dealing just fine. not to mention that as soon as the state attorney was done with me i never heard from them again. another 4 years went by and i was happy and free. i didn’t have to hide anymore. i could do whatever i wanted and not have to worry about that creepy fuck seeing it. last week my mom got a letter in the mail, no clue why no one contacted me, about the jerk. my mom got me in contact with victims advocates through providence to help me get a restraining order against him so when he gets out he cant contact me or my kid (not his btw). so far i have felt overwhelmed, scared, trapped, and alone. the advocate was supposed to help me fill the order out but she gave up on me and sent me home with it. shes not even sure it will get filed due to some judge that doesn’t like to let these orders go through. im trying to get this all done when the rest of my world came to a cluster fuck again. on top of the creep crap i have my kids birthday, overdue PUD bill, rental manager trying to make my life hard, and a family that could give two shits less about me. im so tired of fighting all this that im ready to give up. i cant even find a reason to tell you why i shouldn’t.
he was supposed to be gone till he died of old age. now hes had 8 years to stew on the fact that i put him in jail. what in the fuck is a stupid piece of paper supposed to do?!
the most fucked up part is i was happy in my ignorance. ive never been that happy since.