I love my boyfriend very much, but lately our sex life has been total crap. He tries really hard to do things that he knows will turn me on; but all I have to do is think about how I wish he wouldn’t kiss me with so much tongue–or how if I don’t manage an orgasm in about five minutes once he’s inside me then I’ll have to wait until the next time we have sex–and I just go limp (if that’s appropriate slang for a girl). He senses this and feels really bad for it, and then I feel guilty. But how do you tell a guy who treats you like a queen that he’s mediocre in the sack? Is this what being an adult is about? Choosing your disappointments in life? Because sometimes, I think I’d rather just spend the rest of my life having really hot sex with a succession of boyfriends and forego the whole family thing if it means I have to spend the next 60 years meeting the sexual needs of a guy who still can’t even kiss me properly. And that’s when I know exactly what kind of a horrible bitch I am, because there’s no one else in the world like my boyfriend. No one makes me laugh the way he does. Dammit I suck.