I thank god that you’re gone every day. And those messages that you leave, begging for a call? They make me laugh. They are the highlight of my week. Why? Because for once the tables are turned and you are the one pleading for mercy. Even when I feel at my worst, I smile when I realize that at least I don’t have to end my days by seeing you. I relish in the fact that you don’t have a home or a job. That you are falling down that bitch of a black hole that I like to refer to as “Karma”. Alcoholism does that to a man, you know? So, in celebration of your misfortune, I’m going to take long hot bubble bath and delight myself in the fact that you don’t have running water. I eagerly await your next call. Ciao!
