190714002

i think i have a drug problem. every week i say to myself ‘i’m not taking drugs this week’, then i get drunk and before i know it i’m e-ing, or on speed. i don’t just do it on the weekends too, i get fucked during the week and end up havin g to call in sick to work the next day. last night i got pissed with some friends at my house, and when they all left i took a pill by myself. i don’t even know why i took it, i was on my way to bed and instead i went to the fridge and took it. my friends all think that i’m a crazy party girl, and that i do this stuff for fun. non of them have any idea how often i get fucked, and that i do it alone sometimes. i have a problem, but i don’t want anyone to find out because i actually don’t want to stop. i like taking drugs, it’s fun. i just don’t like the fact that i can’t control it. i keep kidding myself and saying ‘i can control this, i can say no and only take drugs every once in a while’, but i know i can’t and the only way i’m going to get my life back is to stop completely.