…I confess that I really, really don’t like you very much anymore. You’re not the same person you were when we met…or maybe you are, and I was just too blind to see it.
Either way, you’ve ultimately treated me like garbage, and I’d just as soon shove a stick up my arse, pour hot caramel on my head and turn myself into a fucking candy apple before I’d go to your lousy wedding. (Though I’d happily pay thousands for front-row tickets to the ugly, ugly divorce that you will surely have.)